It seems many people treat talking about money as more taboo than discussing sex or politics.
Recently I saw a Facebook post where someone asked their friends how much they were saving each month. It seemed like a straightforward, harmless question. The poster explained they wanted real numbers because they were just starting to save and hoped to learn from others’ experiences.
Instead of a helpful exchange, a commenter replied, “Sharing actual numbers is disgusting. Use percentages, if you must.” The discussion escalated as more people weighed in, and it became clear that openly talking about money made many people uncomfortable and even angry. A large number of respondents called the conversation tacky and insisted money shouldn’t be discussed—ever.
Why must money be kept secret? Is it really that offensive?
As a personal finance blogger who publishes income reports and writes openly about money, I frequently receive messages from readers who are surprised or upset that I share financial details. That response highlights the stigma surrounding money conversations.
Survey data supports that stigma. According to a study by Ally Bank, 70% of Americans consider it rude to talk about money. Respondents were more willing to disclose income (39%) than savings (30%) or debt (29%) to friends and family. People are also reluctant to reveal practical, everyday costs like rent, mortgage payments, or even their internet bill. When did your internet bill become something to hide?
Money remains a taboo topic even among close relatives and married couples. A Fidelity survey found 43% of respondents don’t know how much their partner earns, and 36% don’t know how much their partner has invested. Another study from University College London reported that people are seven times more likely to discuss sex, affairs, and sexually transmitted diseases with a stranger than to disclose their salary. You’d tell a stranger you have an STD before revealing how much you make?
That’s simply illogical. Money affects everyone’s life, so being more open about it makes sense. Below are several reasons why more people should start talking about money.
Why more people should start talking about money
Talking about money can help you.
If you believe money talk is taboo, it may be hard to see how openly discussing finances can benefit you. When people avoid money conversations, they miss critical information such as:
- How much of a raise to request
- How to negotiate a better salary
- The average selling price for homes in an area
- What a fair rent price should be
- Whether monthly expenses—utilities, phone, insurance—are normal or inflated
Without those insights, you may never realize your financial situation needs improvement. People often avoid money talk because it feels “too real,” or because they feel shame about past mistakes or worry they don’t measure up. But ignorance won’t help you improve. Knowing the typical salary for your role, comparable rent or insurance rates, and other benchmarks gives you leverage—to negotiate better pay, reduce costs, and increase savings.
Knowledge is power. The more you learn about money, the better decisions you can make.
Knowing your family’s finances is important.
Understanding your household’s financial picture is essential. Too many families learn about major problems only after severe damage has been done—one spouse may hide significant debt, or the couple may assume their finances are healthy when they are not. I’ve heard from people who don’t know their monthly mortgage or rent, how much they’re contributing to retirement, or how much overall debt they owe. Some spouses dramatically misestimate these figures.
Regular financial conversations and budget meetings make a family more likely to succeed financially and experience less conflict. Key benefits include:
- Working together increases success. When both partners commit to financial goals, they’re more likely to achieve them as a team.
- Preventing financial infidelity. A lack of openness can lead to secret accounts and hidden debt; a Forbes analysis noted that many people keep financial secrets from partners.
- Better budgeting. Knowing the full picture helps you create and stick to a realistic budget and avoid living paycheck to paycheck.
- Shared responsibility. If only one person manages finances, the family is vulnerable if that person becomes unavailable.
- Stronger motivation toward goals. Involvement keeps everyone informed and invested in reaching the family’s objectives.
- Fewer money fights. Regular, transparent conversations reduce surprising financial news and arguments about money.
Talking about money doesn’t have to be awkward.
Money conversations can be practical, respectful, and constructive. You don’t need to make them uncomfortable. Try these approaches with friends and family:
- Discuss your financial goals and why they matter to you.
- Share the amount of debt you have and the steps you’re taking to reduce it.
- Pass along tips that have helped you save money.
- Brainstorm ideas together for increasing income.
Opening up about money helps everyone involved. When people share knowledge and strategies, they can avoid common pitfalls and build stronger financial futures.
How does talking about money make you feel? Is it taboo where you live or within your social circle? Should it be?